Why did you choose Coaching?
I had just gone through the worst shock after a crisis and was so ready to get on with my life (the thesis), but couldn’t find peace of mind and motivation.
I needed help that was action oriented. That is why I turned to Coaching, to finish my thesis in the middle of a very emotional turbulent time of my life.
How was the period of Coaching?
I had a very precise goal with the whole process, to finish my thesis and my education. It was a success – and even within the very optimistic deadline – the period of Coaching has been a very clear success.
I did get a lot of clarity and tools to handle all kinds of challenges I encountered. I got so much from Coaching compared to my expectations. I didn’t believe that the whole project would work, but I got so positively surprised.
Today it is six months since I finished the Coaching period and I still have loads of benefits from the tools I learned.
Actually there are some areas in my life that I didn’t have the energy to go into – which I since have confronted in a very satisfying way. The whole Coaching process stretches further that the three months period – because I have made great use of everything I got from the Coaching afterwards.
What are the three most important things you have learned?
An example of this would be to change the mental perspective of a situation where I do not have any control. Even though it is wonderful to have finished my education, it is no fun looking for work during the financial crisis. But instead of getting desperate about this difficult situation – I put my faith into doing what I can – spending time on other projects that I wouldn’t normally do. I change my perspective from being frustrated to something positive, because I have time to create a wonderful connection with my family and my daughter.
I have learned another tool that is very useful to a control freak that I used to be: “To not act”. It became very clear to me that many of the troubles I got myself into, was because of impatience and too impulsive behaviour patterns. I have learned that by not acting in situations where I am impatient or agitated doesn’t get me into as much trouble as before. I stand out as a much more consistent person that does not evoke as much mistrust as the more improvising person I used to be.
Last but absolutely not least, I now have a focus on myself that was lost. The love of my self will not be forgotten again – and I have become a much better person, a better mother, a better daughter, sister and friend when I remember to love myself and acknowledge my own needs.
My tools for this are simple, such as spending time alone with myself, to breathe all the way down into the stomach, feeling my own presence and be completely present in my relations with other people. Especially presence has been a priceless victory that I and the people close to me all enjoy.
What are the three biggest victories?
I finished my education and by that have been able to start a new era of my life.
Earlier I used to have a strong need for others (especially men) to feel my own being; that feeling is greatly reduced today.
I have become a present human being and by that a better mother, lover and friend.
Did you miss any support between sessions?
No. In the beginning of the Coaching period it was important that I was kept to my agreements. Therefore I got the structure and support I really needed. Later during the period the need for support was much less. Mads was very attuned to where I was and what I needed.
Goals and plans, which were achieved, which were not?
The only goal was my thesis and that was attained much faster and better than expected. The other tools and insights were like an extra spice that I joyfully included.
What is the most important thing that happened to you?
That I am so super cool and worth loving (also by myself).
That I can overcome all challenges.
That I am able to preserve my magic and specialness when I am in a relationship.
That I am to be me – and not give up on my needs.
Can you describe the feeling of yourself from before until now?
I had no feeling of myself when I began Coaching. I needed to be with others (especially men) to have a feeling of myself. I couldn’t be at peace or really handle to be at home.
Now I have such a fine feeling of myself which I respect even though I could risk loosing something that I love. I am now in a relationship that is based on love and respect, which I haven’t known before.
Old feelings of jealousy and the need to hold on tightly is completely gone and now I have a much more healthy relationship than ever before. I no longer feel dependant of my partner.
I have a very proud and clear feeling of who I am as a mother that I didn’t have before. I am no longer just a single mum, but a really wonderful mother that feels herself, her child and creates a deep connection.
Personal development, insights and shifts you have experienced?
I have gone through a crisis in my life with a much stronger self than I had expected. I finished my education, became a mother (for real) and have become a complete human being.
Did you achieve Personal ROI (Return on Investment) in terms of time/investments?
Absolutely! It is impossible to value this in any precise way, but I have a general feeling that I got my moneys worth, so I guess it answers this question.
Would you like to be coached again?
Maybe in relation to some important changes in my life in the future. Coaching works perfect with precise challenges.
How effective are you now?
I am super efficient! My level of efficiency has always been high – often too high, but now I am back to a place where I am part of my own pace. I sometimes choose to be less efficient once in awhile and being present and aware instead.
Something else you want to say?
I am happy, I am balanced - I can balance between play and peace. I am very good at what I do, work efficient and have a clear overview. I am having fun!
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